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August 30, 2006


Shawna R. B. Atteberry

Yep, I get it. I have a blog crush on The Happy Feminist. :)


Yup, I'm with you. It's one of those things that's perfectly normal, but people won't talk about it out of fear of being misconstrued.



My husband and I tease my father about his "man-crush" on a local roboticist. LR is brilliant and groundbreaking and CAN DO NO WRONG, but I sincerely doubt that my father has any desire to sleep with him. He just likes robots.


I have a fair few crushes like that on people I want to emulate. It's part of growth as a human being, surely. I've never thought of it as a crush, more as just wanting to be like someone, and admiring them for that quality...

The same sex thing is probably easier, not least of all because your wife is far less likely to have any nagging doubt in her mind. If I spent a lot of time blogging about one person and how wonderful I thought they were, I suspect my partner would be less bothered by it being man than about a woman - she'd feel less like there was any possibility that I was harbouring a 'real' crush on them...

either way, what anyone else thinks about it is of little or no consequence - anecdotally, it seems about half the people I meet make the immediate assumption that I'm gay, which is, in it's own way, rather flattering, and certainly not something I have any issue with at all.

if my partner of 11 years suddenly started thinking I might be gay, I guess that would potentially pose a bigger problem WRT what I am projecting to the world outside...


And I also use "crush", frankly, to play with people's homophobic anxieties

that's what i like about this! in my opinion, anything we (as feminists and pro-feminists) can do to tweak people's traditional and reactionary ideas about sexuality and gender is progress. even if you're just pulling someone up short mentally, twisting their stereotypical idea of what a "crush" is and/or should be, i think that's great.

and i have a vague recollection of noting, a few months ago when you put up a few posts in a row that really nailed it, that i in fact had a "blog crush" on you! i'll have to ask my boyfriend if he was uncomfortable with that. i can't imagine so, given i profess my crushes on tv baseball analysts, movie characters, and reality-tv stars on a regular basis too :)


I knew I would regret asking the question! Now I'm getting my homophobic anxieties played with!

Sounds quite rational to me. I prefer "hero-worship", but then, I went to Grammar school where it was, and is, very common.

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