A long bit on teaching the body as a male professor

It's a busy week as we head towards winter intersession finals...

Lots of good stuff out there this week on feminism and body image.  Mind the Gap, a Welsh feminist blogging collective, has put up a series of terrific posts this week on the subject of women and bodies.  A  number of powerful, first-person accounts from the frontlines, as well as some interesting feminist analysis.  Let me, in that regard, also recommend this recent post from Jen at Righteous Revolution, Theorizing Breasts.

Today in my women's history class, we'll have our last discussion about "body history."  I'll be talking about the recent shift towards the ideal of the toned and athletic female body.  Forty years ago, adult and adolescent women dieted -- but rarely if ever joined gyms to tone and define their bodies.  The coming of women's sports (especially thanks to Title IX), seems to have inadvertently helped to make the perfect body even more elusive.   Joan Brumberg reports that it is only in the 1970s that girls start to mention "working out" as part of their "body projects", while dieting to lose weight is first mentioned regularly beginning in the early 1920s!  Young women today have the difficult task of navigating through contradictory ideal after contradictory ideal: thin but still athletic; toned but not overly muscular; breasts big enough to attract attention and look good in clothes but not so big as to attract too much attention or interfere with athletic pursuits, etcetera.

In my classes, we trace the history of these ever-shifting, unattainable ideals.  In my youth group, we talk often about the pain and frustration that result from trying to live up to them (or choosing to live outside of them).  In both forums, we talk about solutions.  In an academic setting, we tend to focus more on cultural and social strategies for changing women's relationships with their bodies; in the youth group, with younger teens, we focus more on spiritual and psychological tools for coping and transforming.   I certainly don't have a magic bullet to help either high school or college students cope with the colossal pressures that come with trying to live up to the ideal, but I do provide a history of the problem and a safe place for discussion and sharing.

Let me get to the point of my post: I've spent a long time reflecting on how my identity as a male professor and youth leader affects the work I do.  For starters, I often have to overcome an extraordinary amount of suspicion as to my motives.  Who, some folks wonder, is this grown man with such an intense professional interest in young women's body image?  What are his real motives?  Folks assume that I must be deriving some sort of sexual thrill from the work I do, or that I'm pretending to be sensitive (in order to gain access to young women) by expressing great interest in a intensely painful and important subject.  Most of my students and youth group kids (as well as their parents), who spend enough time around me come to realize that my boundaries are (if I may say so) pretty darned solid.  I like to think I've worked out a way to be both emotionally nurturing and intellectually provocative without crossing any lines I ought never cross.

But still, it is a bit odd for many people to have a man teaching this aspect of women's history in particular.  It's not just suspicion about my motives.  It's the fact that I haven't lived in a woman's body, even for a moment.  Though I've struggled with my own body issues, I've struggled with them as a man trying to live up to a very different (though perhaps equally elusive) physical ideal.  And so when leading discussions on these topics in either a church or classroom setting, I'm always very careful not to presume too much.  I let my students and my teens share their experiences, and then I try (sometimes deftly, sometimes not), to tie their personal narratives into the larger cultural story.  After all of these years, I will say that most of what I hear is fairly familiar!  Self-loathing is a predictable constant, as is the desire for control.  It is axiomatic that there will be usually be a lot of ambivalence about sexuality; some are desperate to use their sexuality in order to be seen, others desperate to hide their sexuality for the very same reason, some anxious simply to disappear and not be "seen" at all.  Sometimes, I feel the weight of the collective pain in the room and I almost gasp.

In a way, it's easier for me to teach this material than it is for my female colleagues.  I've got a few colleagues who teach women's history here and at other places; a couple of them do offer lectures and sections on body issues. Invariably, they become aware that their own bodies are being assessed and judged.  One of my colleagues is a woman of considerable size, and has been since she hit puberty.   She's become comfortable in her skin, but she reports that some of her students simply won't listen to her on the subject of eating disorders and body image.  "They're afraid, you see" , she says.  "They worry more about ending up looking like me when they are older than they worry about being happy."  Another colleague has the opposite problem; like me, she's a distance runner.  She is lean and petite.  She's had students with different body types react angrily to her:  "What could you know about how I'm feeling?"  In a way, the fact that I'm male makes things easier for me because female students (the overwhelming majority of those enrolled in my women's history classes are of course female) aren't comparing their bodies to mine.   They can't set me up as a role model, and they can't turn me into a mother figure with whom to compete or by whom to be judged. 

I had a young man recently email me; he's just started a grad program in women's studies and is beginning to TA his first courses.  He wanted advice about being a man and teaching courses on women's history and feminism; in particular, he wanted to know how I made myself seem "safe".   He knows that in academic feminism, the line between the intensely personal and the rigorously intellectual is often razor-thin.  He knows enough feminist theory to know that we always bring our embodied selves to the classroom.  He wants to know how he can get his students to open up, to feel comfortable sharing anecdotes as well as debating ideas.  He's particularly interested in "body issues", but worried about how his own maleness will affect the discussions he leads on that topic.  I told him that the obvious thing he needs to do is work on becoming a good listener; he needs to remember (if he ever forgot) that in gender studies, personal narratives do matter and do deserve both time and respect.  That doesn't mean turning the classroom into the Oprah show, but it does mean giving students the opportunity to share the ways in which the material has meaning for their own lives.  I told him "Don't worry about empathizing.  You don't have to 'get it' on a personal and experiential level.  Trust your own compassion and your own intuition, and don't worry if you don't identify with every aspect of every story you hear.  Not every woman identifies with every other woman either.  Your job isn't to share someone else's pain, your job is to listen actively and respectfully, and then gently weave her story into a larger web of stories".  Seeing that larger web of stories is key to moving to the next step, which is talking about solutions.

In the end, no serious feminist can deny that teaching "body history" is a vital part of women's studies.  And it would be silly to pretend that when we do teach it, we teach as disembodied voices.  We must all acknowledge the plain reality that our students and others will always filter what we say through their understanding of the bodies they see us in.  They will make comparisons and judgments, just as we do.  In some ways, the male professor's body is a limitation -- it is evidence that his experience has been, ultimately, radically different than that of the majority of his students.  At the same time, because of this difference, it gives him the chance to connect with his students without the complications that come from having the students over-identify the material with the teacher's own life story.  Above all, though, a man doing this job must approach the subject with a healthy degree of both patience and humility.  As the yeas go by, the stories may seem depressingly familiar.  But the fact that we hear similar stories from our students, year after year, about despair and self-loathing doesn't mean that we don't have an obligation to hear them with rapt attentiveness.

Do I benefit from being a man who listens?  Sure.   Some folks are so amazed that a man is willing to do this work and lead these discussions that they tend to treat me with a sense of wonder.  That's male privilege again -- men getting patted on the back for doing what women do without thanks.  But the fact that I do get undue praise doesn't mean the work isn't vitally important, and it doesn't mean that men shouldn't be doing it.

Comments

[alexander]

male privilege again -- men getting patted on the back for doing what women do without thanks.

What is wrong with that?

[Hugo]

Um, it's generally considered wrong to give one class of people props for doing things while taking another class for granted for doing the exact same thing.

[alexander]

Hugo:

Sure, and if we were talking about white privelege vs black oppression under segregation, I'd probably agree. But consider any/all of the following female priveleges:

1) Immunity to being militarily drafted.

2) Women expecting men to open the door for them. (Was a woman ever arrested for not giving her seat up to a man on a bus. compare with Rosa Parks?)

3) Women expecting men to pick up the tab for them, from dating through alimony payments.

4) Child custody/visitation rights.

5) "Choice for men" (which I do not want to debate here).

6) Men protecting women. The other day I was talking with a female friend who made a big production that men are obligated to walk women to their cars in order to protect them from muggers and such -- i.e., men are obligated to risk their lives to protect women.

7) Etc.

If women were to give up their priveleges then I think men would not hesitate to give up theirs. But so far, it has all been a one-way street.

[Hugo]

Alex, you're trying to hijack the thread. If you can't stick to the issue at hand -- men teaching women's studies classes -- then find another forum.

[evil_fizz]

You know, I would gladly trade the ability to walk freely around at night by myself for "male protection" any damn day of the week. Try to patronize us a little less, okay? /rant

[Breadfish]

"Immunity to being militarily drafted."

Men haven't been drafted in decades, either. Moot point.

"Women expecting men to open the door for them."

Nobody can make you, and quite frankly not only do most modern women my age not really expect most men to, some are kind of weirded out by strangers opening doors for them. I certainly am.

And actually, I've had plenty of random guys let doors slam in my face behind them. I don't make a big deal about it either, even if it is slightly rude. Usually both sexes will make sure that the person behind them has the door before they let go, thankfully.

"Women expecting men to pick up the tab for them, from dating through alimony payments."

I can't help you with the alimony problem (besides suggesting contraceptives), but again, if you don't want to pay for the dinner/movie/whatever for your date, tell her beforehand that you'd rather split the cost. If she won't do it, then don't go on a date with her. She can either get over it or find somebody else. There's plenty in life that can be negotiated between two individuals, maybe you should be more willing to speak up.

"Men protecting women. The other day I was talking with a female friend who made a big production that men are obligated to walk women to their cars in order to protect them from muggers and such -- i.e., men are obligated to risk their lives to protect women."

Again, nobody can stick a gun to your head and make you. If some girl wants you to be her personal body guard, just say "no" and forget about her. Or better yet, find the running rates for hollywood body guards and ask her for a salary. ;)

"If women were to give up their priveleges then I think men would not hesitate to give up theirs."

If I know human nature, most people are very much NOT willing to give up ANY real or percieved priveleges unless they're forced to, and then only grudgingly. You're fooling yourself if you believe that either sex is ever just going to throw their arms up and say "Hey, you folks just do whatever the hell you want!"

[Hugo]

Sorry, folks -- any further comments on ANY issue not directly related to the primary topic of the post will be deleted. That goes for everyone here, both feminist and anti-feminist.

[Noumena]

Gah, that was the fastest I've ever seen a thread get hijacked around here.

Thanks for this Hugo. I won't be TAing for another seven months or so, and teaching my own class is years away, but the past couple weeks I've been thinking about what my dream Intro to Phil class would look like -- units on Locke and Wollstonecraft, some Marx and de Beauvoir, both Mills instead of just John (sadly, I can't think of anyone the Western tradition identifies as at all approaching "Great Philosopher" status who wasn't white, but at least my syllabus has equal numbers of men and women). The proto- and first-wave feminists can probably be taught much like "ordinary" philosophers, but I'm really going to have to think about how, because I am a man, I will teach second- and third-wavers like de Beauvoir or Andrea Dworkin.

And that's just a start, of course. I believe that an important part of my work as a feminist philosopher will be to cultivate the next generation of feminists; and that involves much more than just a single course.

[Hugo]

Noumena, perhaps we should start a very small blog ring: pro-feminist men in the academy... sharing ideas and stuff... could be good...

[evil_fizz]

It's sort of odd, Hugo, because I would have thought you would have faced the "well, you just don't get it" reaction. I would have thought that the line between being a professional and being a man would have been more than some students were comfortable with. Not having been in your classroom (but having been taught by some other male pro-feminists), I sometimes felt patronized, that somehow when my experiences didn't correspond with the literature, that the literature was right and I was wrong.

Talking about body issues, even in the abstract, is so intensely uncomfortable for many people (male and female) that it's hard to have a good discussion. In my class, we managed to talk about Gibson girls through girdles and then it broke down. There were too many personal feelings (and it was a seminar class).

[Hugo]

Evil, I suppose when I was first teaching this stuff I did fall into the pit of patronizing. I'm clear now, however, that a feminist classroom is not one in which students are compelled to see themselves in the literature. I try and invite "yes, no, and hmmm" responses to the material; students get a chance to sift through the material and compare it to their own lives.

I am sure that many students are uncomfortable, not just with my sex but with disclosure; that's fine. There are always other students willing to take risks, and give permission to their classmates to explore.

I've led some great discussions -- you'll have to take my word for it, unless a student weighs in here -- on some very sensitive subjects. It doesn't always work; classroom chemistry is a funny thing. One never knows from semester to semester what will "work." But I've had classes where we've had free-wheeling discussions about menarche and tampons and bras and diets; I've had others where students stared hard at their desks. One never knows what will work from semester to semester.

[Anne Marie]

Hugo, I have been lurking here for a while but saw this post and wanted to comment. I took your women's studies class last spring. You really freaked me out at first, a male professor who knew so much about women. I did think you were either gay or out to scam on girls half your age, and so I was wary for a long time.

I remember the discussion about masturbation and clitorectomys (sp?) so vividly. I was very uncomfortable. But I was fascinated too, dont get me wrong. I think you do understand women very well, and the class knows it. People get to trust you the more they know you, and the discussions got beter as we went through the semester. So, yes, evil fizz, Hugo can teach women well. I dont think he's patronizing at all.

But Hugo, you must
know teh effect your clothes, looks, and body have on the class. Be honest and admit you bring your sexuality into the classroom every single day. I dont know if you can help it or not, actually. ;-)

[mythago]

Wow, the trolls are learning subtlety.

Hugo, what's interesting to me is how fitness and strength are now acceptable to women, and not merely in a "get that tummy flat!" kind of way.

[Hugo]

Yeah, except she really was a student. Anne, thanks for the kind words --I think.

Mythago, the connection between Title IX and the fitness/strength boom is fairly clear, I think; the only downside is that it may have made the "ideal" even more elusive...

[lj]

Gotta See This:
A Birdshot Pellet Has Migrated to The Heart of The Man Shot by Dick Cheney

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,184846,00.html

[Gordon K]

As a guy who took his first women's studies class last semester, I also found it surprising that people are so amazed when men take an interest in the subject. There is an assumption, as you said, that such interests are a sign of gayness, of predatory behavior, or of being "just plain weird". But I didn't see male privilege in most of the reactions I got - a few were positive, but the vast majority involved suspicion, distrust, and confusion.

I'm getting ready to teach a 10 week workshop on disability issues, and I'm modeling parts of it on that class - but I have to wonder whether anyone will sign up. Those non-disabled students that do are, I believe, deserving of a certain recognition; they want to learn about issues of social justice in which they have little or no obvious stake (the inobvious benefits will be one of our topics). But they will not be subject to the same suspicion that a man in a women's studies class is.

[Zebee Johnstone]

I'm not the kind of woman who does Women's Studies (there are times I think I'm not using that extra X chromosome) but I am very familiar with the body image problem and with how women in groups deal with it.

There always seems to be judgements spoken and unspoken. I find it easier to talk about body image with a man than with a woman, it seems much less judgemental. I suppose because men who I would discuss such things with have learned not to say anything when negotiating that minefield!

I wonder... how would a mostly male class dealing with male body image react to a female teacher? Would they have the same problems or different ones?

[Zebee Johnstone]

I'm not the kind of woman who does Women's Studies (there are times I think I'm not using that extra X chromosome) but I am very familiar with the body image problem and with how women in groups deal with it.

There always seems to be judgements spoken and unspoken. I find it easier to talk about body image with a man than with a woman, it seems much less judgemental. I suppose because men who I would discuss such things with have learned not to say anything when negotiating that minefield!

I wonder... how would a mostly male class dealing with male body image react to a female teacher? Would they have the same problems or different ones?

[Kim]

Hugo -- As a prof who teaches Women's History to a class that is consistently nearly all women, I'd be very interested to know if you have any specific ways you draw men into your Women's Studies classes, and how you keep them engaged. Any thoughts?