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January 05, 2006

Comments

Andermom

Okay, even though this thread has sort of died out, I just found it and have a few cents to add.

Will- perhaps a better way to think of what Hugo is encouraging (fewer compliments on appearance and more compliments on other things) is that by commenting on something other than appearance you will guarantee that the woman will not be complimented *only* on appearance. Think of an activity where people go around the room and give compliments to everyone. You notice that one person is only complimented on their handwriting. You decide that you will compliment that person on something totally unrelated to their handwriting to offset the trend. Girls will recieve comments on their appearance, by limiting your comments to things other than appearance you are offsetting what other people are unconciously doing.

And did anyone else find it disturbing that from Alexander's comments it seems like he believes that [not complimenting a woman's appearance] = [not complimenting a woman]. It's almost like there isn't anything else to compliment a woman about.

will

Andermom:
"perhaps a better way to think of what Hugo is encouraging (fewer compliments on appearance and more compliments on other things) is that by commenting on something other than appearance you will guarantee that the woman will not be complimented *only* on appearance."

I have no disagreement with you. My questions were really more fleshing out people's presumptions about compliments from men as opposed to women.

I also find it interesting that some people assume that only gay men know anything about fashion. That seems inappropriately sterotypical.

mythago

But, I am curious about whether your reaction is the same when a female compliments your clothes as a man.

Yes. It has a lot more to do with how well I know them and their manner.

By the way, if a strange man makes a comment about my clothing, I don't assume he wants me. I do assume he was raised by wolves. ;)

will

mythago:


Mowgli knew fashion?

Markymark

Hi, im Mark and I guess im introducing myself!!

I came across this site suing 'stumble' (Firefox) and thought all the ideas foalting around hete seem realyl interesting! (Although I don't seem to agree with everything lol)

Well, thats me ;)!

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