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January 30, 2006

Comments

*Christopher

Hugo,

Thanks for this repost. We still live with a pleasure/denial dichotomy in our society that oft subtly understands sacrifice in terms of giving up and pain only and that cannot see pleasure as a good.

barb

Yeah, I second that. This is, indeed a good post.

alexander

To paint with broad strokes, earlier periods in American culture demonized women's sexuality.

Most men I know would want women to enjoy sex, and pursue it more actively.

alexander

To paint with broad strokes, earlier periods in American culture demonized women's sexuality.

Most men I know would want women to enjoy sex, and pursue it more actively.

Antigone

Fix that problem.

Thank you Hugo. I get so frustrated with some of my ideological counterparts and I think it comes down to the idea of self-denial. Self-denial is ONLY good when what you are denying yourself is bad: ie, it causes harm to others and yourself (and when it causes harm only to yourself, I still don't necessarily see that as bad). Denying yourself pleasure because it is pleasurable always seemed a little silly to me: what's wrong with pleasure?

And, with that, that's not to say that as a feminist I do not get pleasure in other people's joy, I very much do. I like it when my loved ones are happy and comfortable. But I don't feel I should ignore my happiness for theirs. I'm willing to cook for my roommate when he has a big test coming up, but if it's final week, I'm not going to cook for him to the neglect of my own studying, nor would I cook if I am not also going to eat.

mythago

It's less about controlling women's pleasure than in controlling their appetite--their want for sex, food, whatever--and in asserting power.

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